5 Tips for Setting Goals with Gentleness

A new year is upon us, and you know what that means. There are new goals and new ambitions to conquer, and as always Being Classic Britney Blog will be here rooting for you and providing helpful solutions and ideas along the way. But, we would be remised if we did not share this topic that has been on our minds–burn out. How often do we go into a new season with many goals and expectations, find ourselves not achieving them, and then depressed by say, March? Well, if this sounds familiar, we have 5 tips for setting goals with gentleness that just might help combat the old flow.

gentleness- noun | softness of action or effect; lightness.

Google Definitions

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my story.

In actuality, 2020 was a decent year for me. Aside from warranted social unrest, a whole pandemic, and a weeks wait to find out who would be the next president, 2020 was not that bad primarily because I accomplished everything I set out to on my 2020 vision board. In the years before where I’d make a list of the things I wanted to accomplish in the upcoming year, I’d never really be able to put a dent on the list. Instead I’d be left with failed goals and frustration. This year, however, I did everything.

Thank you. Thank you for that.

The truth is, I wrote down my goals in my journal prior to making my vision board. By the time I got to the vision board party, I was ready to find images that matched my goals. I flipped through magazine for as long as my friends, but I was only able to find a few pictures to match the most important things. Originally, I felt a way. I thought my vision board was not complete, but my friend’s got me together by saying, “maybe you can’t find the images because you are only supposed to focus on these things this year.” We get deep like, but the message was clear–stop doing the most all the time and focus on what’s important. By focusing only on a few things, I was able to accomplish everything–for the first time ever.

The difference in my 2020 list and the list in years before was that I set my goals with intention. I was realistic about my expectations and my limitations. The result was being able to see all of the things come into manifestation. So it got me to thinking.

break it down, B:

When I load up my goals, I never have the time, resources, or understanding to accomplish them all. One year, ya’ll, I wrote I wanted to learn Spanish among 16 other things. It was ridiculous. The thought itself was not ridiculous. The manner of which I was pursuing the goals were.

Truth is, ambition is a beautiful thing. It was ambition that prompted me to add learning a foreign language on my list. It was ambition that urged me to add 16 thousand goals to my list. Ambition that fueled the excitement and desires to go after all of those things. Lastly, it was faith and hope that made me feel like those things could be done in one year. Unfortunately, when I have my head in the clouds, high on ambition, my feet have been to far away from the ground, that I ended up falling every time.

My advice, is to set goals with gentleness.

Ultimately, our ambition it what keeps us going. Sadly, it can also be the thing that tears us down, if we are not careful. How often to do we overwork ourselves to overachieve, achieve, or attempt to become and do the things we set out to without thinking about our wellness? Not this time, sis. Not this year.

Yes. Yes. Go for gold, that’s what we do, but pursue the gold with your spiritual, mental, and physical health in mind. Perhaps, focusing solely on your bag, will make for a hardened heart, a cloudy mind, and physical troubles.This year, I urge you to reach your goals, but do so by being gentle with yourself and by making things lighter with strategy and reality in reach.

With that said, below, I have 5 tips for setting goals with gentleness.

5 Tips for Setting Goals with Gentleness

  1. Remember your obligations. Let’s be honest, as we get older, or responsibilities grow. Perhaps you are a mom now, so you need to keep space for parenting. Perhaps you are a wife now, and you need to keep space to nurture your marriage. That said, when making goals, remember your ongoing obligations. Remember your ongoing obligations not to stifle your achievement, but to make life easier for yourself when you become laser focused on your goals. Ask the the question, “What do I have space to actually achieve outside of my obligations?” The answer should be great because love and children won’t stop you, but help to strengthen your roots.
  2. Save room for life. Try not to create goals with so much rigidity, that you don’t make space for unplanned blessings and experiences. You may fall in love this year. You may be met the an undeniable opportunity this year. Great things are definitely on the way, so you don’t want to pre-pack too much on your plate and not leave room to see the good the year has waiting for you.
  3. A year is just a year. But really, a year is only 365 days, 52 weeks, 12 months, with 4-5 weeks a piece, and it goes by really fast. We’ll be saying happy new year one minute, while grilling hot dogs for the Independence day in the next. That said, be realistic about what you will actually have time to accomplish in one year. Perhaps, 12 months is not enough time to learn how to fly a plane and buy a plane, but it may be enough time to enroll in flight school.
  4. Limit yourself to three. In my pursuit of blogging and brand building knowledge, I have found that many of the gurus suggest you only create three top goals to focus on a year. These could be business related, personal, or both. Nonetheless, by limiting yourself to three top goals, you can carry on the year with only three things in mind, and find yourself getting closer and closer to achieving them each day. Focusing on three really helped me get through all of my vision board goals in 2020.
  5. Follow up with action steps. After establishing your top three, comb through those goals with a fine tooth. In other words, follow up each of the three goals with attainable action steps. The actions steps may take days, weeks, or months to complete, but as long as you have them in place, you know that you are working toward your three goals.

sum it up.

Gentleness is the key word this year. Yes, we want to grow. Whether if it’s our businesses, careers, or otherwise, we want to see growth, goals, and achievement, and that is wonderful, but before we can achieve we need to breath and ensure our wellness, is, well. We are goal getters as always, but it is our physical, mental, and spiritual health that makes way for us to achieve.

If we neglect our wellness by piling on too much, being inflexible, and not enjoying moments, we’ll find ourselves burned out, or worse, a pile of goals and with no love in our hearts. While the bag is heavy, it is not everything. Our God given purposes, to include love, joy, and praise depend on a healthy mind, body, and spirit.(Romans 12:2)

That said, it is my hope these 5 tips for setting goals with gentleness with help you priorities your goals, see your goals manifest this year with your mind, heart and soul rejoicing.

And just to kick things up a notch, download the “Setting Gentle Goals” Worksheet below.

download the “Setting Goals With Gentleness Worksheet”


  1. All work and no play, isn’t good for anyone.
  2. Always make room for good things.
  3. Small bites are good for the digestive system.

quotes to carry.

It is by no means a bad thing to be ambitious, but I needed to develop healthier habits in order to truly be successful.

Elaine Welteroth, from More than Enough

journal prompt.

Download the worksheet, and let your heart write!

comment below.

Tell us about your goals for 2021.

related reads.

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